Chapter 17 | Page 3b: Hot Stuff

Posted on December 19, 2025 by Brad Guigar

Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.

Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.

Transcript

Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…

Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)

Panel 2

Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}

Panel 3

Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.

Panel 4

Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.

Panel 5

Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod

After Dark

This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.

  • Yes, he lives up to his name.

  • Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.

  • No, the North Pole will never be the same.

I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!

Spider-Man 3 Villains

Posted on April 24, 2007 by Brad Guigar

‘Spider-Man 3’ Villains Talk About Villainy

[AP] Tobey Maguire’s Spider-Man is so good at his job that his Hollywood handlers put him up against three enemies this time.

“Spider-Man 3” continues Peter Parker and alter-ego Spider-Man’s battle against old pal Harry Osborn ( James Franco), who’s out to avenge his father’s death, which he blames on Spidey.

Meantime, petty crook Flint Marko (Thomas Haden Church) escapes from prison to try to help his sickly daughter and blunders into a scientific experiment that transforms him into the Sandman, who can shift into sand formations and uses the ability to steal and beat up on Spider-Man.

Spider-Man himself is tempted by his dark side as he learns the truth about his beloved Uncle Ben’s death, and he’s infected by an alien entity that brings out his inner villain. Spidey’s struggle eventually encompasses Peter’s news photography rival, Eddie Brock ( Topher Grace), who becomes the black-hearted Venom, a creature with powers similar to Spider-Man’s.

Read the entire interview.