Chapter 17 | Page 13b: Hard bargaining

Posted on April 2, 2026 by Brad Guigar

At Evil Inc, even labor negotiations can spiral out of control — especially when “hard bargaining” takes on a whole new meaning. Cassie Cruz just realized that the conference room she prepped for Dr. Muskiday’s… unconventional solution… is already booked for a high-stakes union negotiation. Unfortunately, it looks like Doctor Threat and the henchpersons may have already reached an agreement.

I’d love your help with something big: Nominations are now open for the 2026 ’Ringo Awards, and reader nominations make all the difference. If the comic has ever made you laugh, please consider nominating Evil Inc for Best Humor Webcomic — it only takes a minute, and your support truly means a lot. You can submit your nomination here: https://go.evil-inc.net/ringo

Transcript

Panel 1
Cassie Cruz (angry):
“We are NOT having an orgy at our desks!”

Dr. Muskiday (calmly defensive):
“Of course not! I stocked the conference room with mattresses and lube.”

Panel 2
Cassie Cruz (panicking):
“The conference room?! Doctor Threat is scheduled to negotiate a new contract with the henchpersons’ union in there!”

Panel 3
Cassie Cruz (looking toward a slightly open door):
“Where’s Doctor Threat?”

Dr. Muskiday (matter-of-fact):
“I believe that’s him in the middle of — erm — ‘collective bargaining.’”

(Sound effects from behind the closed conference room door:)
“Hhh hhh”
“Plap Ngh Plap Plap”
“Hngh hhh”
“mmf mmf mmf”

Detailed Alt Text

A three-panel comic set inside an office at Evil Inc.

Panel 1: Cassie Cruz, a professional woman with short brown hair, red glasses, a white blazer, and a low-cut yellow top, stands beside her desk looking furious. A small pink “emotion cloud” with a skull icon floats near her head, indicating anger. She shouts that they are not having an orgy at their desks. Standing nearby is Dr. Muskiday, a short humanoid with a fly’s head—large red compound eyes, small body, and lab coat—who calmly explains that he already prepared the conference room with mattresses and lube.

Panel 2: Close-up on Cassie clutching her head in alarm. Her expression is wide-eyed and panicked. She exclaims that the conference room is supposed to be used for an important union negotiation between Doctor Threat and the henchpersons’ union.

Panel 3: Cassie and Dr. Muskiday stand in a hallway facing a slightly open conference room door. Cassie asks where Doctor Threat is. Muskiday gestures toward the door and awkwardly suggests that Doctor Threat is inside, in the middle of “collective bargaining,” implying something sexual. From inside the room comes exaggerated, comic-style sound effects indicating vigorous activity: heavy breathing (“hhh hhh,” “hngh”), rhythmic “plap” noises, and muffled sounds (“mmf mmf”). The implication is that the union negotiation has devolved into an orgy inside the conference room.

Phables April 23, 2007

Posted on April 23, 2007 by Brad Guigar

Phables

Today’s Phable is a funny story about a woman delivering her first child. She has a unique reaction when a nun offers a solution to her intense labor pains.

So, let me pull back the curtain for you and talk a little bit about how this one got into the paper.

This will make more sense if you read Phables first. Go ahead. I’ll wait.

I brought that comic to my editor, as is my standard procedure, the week pefore it was scheduled to run.

Seeing the religious content, she showed it to a broad spectrum of people around the newsroom. She told me the reaction ran the gamut from “Fantastic!” to “Complete waste of a page.”

The negative response seemed to hover around two things. In the original version, the book was clearly labeled “The Holy Bible” and the act of throwing the Bible at the nun was visually depicted — with a resounding thump.

It was a real dilema for me. If I ran it the way it was — the way I thought it had the most impact as a humorous piece — I would risk alienating some of my readers. But would changing it be tantamount to buckling to a dogmatic sense of religion?

I gave this a tremendous amount of thought, and I finally decided to change the way the story was presented. Taking a page from Alfred Hitchcock, I let the action appear off panel, letting the reader’s imagination fill in the rest. I also made the reference to the Bible itself more ambiguous.

And here’s why: I want people to enjoy Phables for what it is — great storytelling about Philadelphia. If the presentation of that story antagonized a portion of my readership to the point that they wouldn’t be able to enjoy the story, then perhaps that presentation had to be re-thought.

I didn’t change any of the facts of the story, mind you. Rather, I chose to present it in such a way that a greater number of readers could enjoy it.

I’m sure some readers still found it offensive. Let’s face it, you don’t present a humorous piece to 150,000 people and avoid offending someone. (And that doesn’t even include the online readership.) But I think the new version was more appealing to a wider range of people.

With that in mind, here’s the original version. Please don’t click on the link if you’re easily offended over religious issues.