At Evil Inc, even labor negotiations can spiral out of control — especially when “hard bargaining” takes on a whole new meaning. Cassie Cruz just realized that the conference room she prepped for Dr. Muskiday’s… unconventional solution… is already booked for a high-stakes union negotiation. Unfortunately, it looks like Doctor Threat and the henchpersons may have already reached an agreement.
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Transcript
Panel 1
Cassie Cruz (angry):
“We are NOT having an orgy at our desks!”
Dr. Muskiday (calmly defensive):
“Of course not! I stocked the conference room with mattresses and lube.”
Panel 2
Cassie Cruz (panicking):
“The conference room?! Doctor Threat is scheduled to negotiate a new contract with the henchpersons’ union in there!”
Panel 3
Cassie Cruz (looking toward a slightly open door):
“Where’s Doctor Threat?”
Dr. Muskiday (matter-of-fact):
“I believe that’s him in the middle of — erm — ‘collective bargaining.’”
(Sound effects from behind the closed conference room door:)
“Hhh hhh”
“Plap Ngh Plap Plap”
“Hngh hhh”
“mmf mmf mmf”
Detailed Alt Text
A three-panel comic set inside an office at Evil Inc.
Panel 1: Cassie Cruz, a professional woman with short brown hair, red glasses, a white blazer, and a low-cut yellow top, stands beside her desk looking furious. A small pink “emotion cloud” with a skull icon floats near her head, indicating anger. She shouts that they are not having an orgy at their desks. Standing nearby is Dr. Muskiday, a short humanoid with a fly’s head—large red compound eyes, small body, and lab coat—who calmly explains that he already prepared the conference room with mattresses and lube.
Panel 2: Close-up on Cassie clutching her head in alarm. Her expression is wide-eyed and panicked. She exclaims that the conference room is supposed to be used for an important union negotiation between Doctor Threat and the henchpersons’ union.
Panel 3: Cassie and Dr. Muskiday stand in a hallway facing a slightly open conference room door. Cassie asks where Doctor Threat is. Muskiday gestures toward the door and awkwardly suggests that Doctor Threat is inside, in the middle of “collective bargaining,” implying something sexual. From inside the room comes exaggerated, comic-style sound effects indicating vigorous activity: heavy breathing (“hhh hhh,” “hngh”), rhythmic “plap” noises, and muffled sounds (“mmf mmf”). The implication is that the union negotiation has devolved into an orgy inside the conference room.
Courting Disaster
Courting Disaster, my weekly comic about sex, love, and relationships updates every Friday.
You’ll laugh your pants off.This week’s question:
I love my husband, but he has no clue of how to treat me sometimes. We’ve been together for almost two years and married for one month. In that time I have made it very clear that I hate his "Playboy" magazines and other such reading material. I have even told him it makes me feel like there are other women in our relationship. On top of that, he complains about our sex life and tells me he thinks a size 6 is "getting thick." (I am a 4.) He even made a comment the other day that his ex-wife gave him the best (you fill it in) of his life and that he hadn’t had a good one since. I have lost a lot of self-esteem. I know our sex life has declined because I do not want to be naked in front of him when he feels this way and has perfectly airbrushed pictures of other women naked. Also, for Valentine’s, even after I made a HUGE deal about it in advance and told him NOT to buy lingerie for me, saying that I had enough of it but to simply do something nice and sweet, he got me lingerie. From a sex toy Web site. What should I do? –Feeling Small?Go on over and offer some
advice.
