Chapter 17, Page 18b: Motivational Speaker Nightmare

Today’s Evil Inc is a true motivational speaker nightmare! Meanwhile, Dr. Muskiday discovers that his evolving emotion-cloud technology is spiraling out of control!

’Ringo Awards — Last Chance

The nomination round for the Ringo Awards closes on Thursday! If you’ve been enjoying Evil Inc, Evil Inc After Dark, or any of my recent work, I’d be honored if you considered tossing a nomination my way. https://go.evil-inc.net/ringo

Bonus Rewards

One of the easiest things to overlook on Patreon is the archive of posts tagged Bonus Rewards — and there’s a lot of good stuff buried in there.

These posts include wallpapers, eComics, downloadable extras, and assorted goodies collected over the years. Better yet, they never expire, so you can dip into the archive anytime and discover a few hidden gems waiting for you.

If you haven’t explored those tags lately, it’s worth a deep dive — https://go.evil-inc.net/patreon

ICYMI

This week's bonus cartoon featured the Fantastic Four.

Well... most of 'em... 

 


Transcript

Panel 1:

Dr. Muskiday, bursting into Cassie Cruz’s office:Cassie! You need to send everybody home — NOW!

Panel 2:

(Inset panel) Cassie Cruz: I can’t do that! The quarterly wellness surveys are due by five o’clock, and if we miss compliance, corporate will send that insufferable motivational speaker again.

Susan, a supervillain motivational speaker, speaks to the assembled villains of Evil Inc: People said I’d never weaponize my childhood trauma. Look at me now.

The whiteboard has a number of phrases written in it:

Failure isn’t falling into a volcano. Failure is falling into the same volcano twice.

A hero is just a villain with better P.R.

Susan Says… Your greatest weakness can become your greatest strength… unless your weakness is silver, garlic, or emotional intimacy.

Panel 3:

Dr. Muskiday: You don’t understand! The micronanos are evolving into MACRONANOES!

Panel 4:

Dr. Muskiday: They’ll control everybody in the office. We have to get everyone out of here before…

Panel 5:

Dr. Muskiday (continues): ...it’s too late.

There is an emoji cloud enveloping Cassie’s entire head.

Alt Text

Five-panel “Evil Inc” comic set inside the Evil Inc office.

Panel 1: Dr. Muskiday bursts into Cassie Cruz’s office in a panic. His insect-like eyes are wide, his arms thrown dramatically into the air as he shouts, “Cassie! You need to send everybody home — NOW!” Cassie sits calmly behind her desk, turned toward him in surprise. Her office contains a laptop, paperwork, and pink file boxes.

Panel 2: An inset panel shows Cassie responding nervously from her office chair: “I can’t do that! The quarterly wellness surveys are due by five o’clock, and if we miss compliance, corporate will send that insufferable motivational speaker again…” The rest of the panel cuts to a seminar room where a stylish supervillain motivational speaker named Susan addresses a bored-looking audience of villains seated in folding chairs. Susan is an older woman with swept-back silver hair, glasses, and a dramatic purple outfit with a high collar. She gestures confidently while declaring, “People said I’d never weaponize my childhood trauma. Look at me now.” Behind her, a whiteboard displays ridiculous motivational slogans, including: “Failure isn’t falling into a volcano. Failure is falling into the same volcano twice,” “A hero is just a villain with better P.R.,” and “Susan Says… Your greatest weakness can become your greatest strength… unless your weakness is silver, garlic, or emotional intimacy.”

Panel 3: Back in Cassie’s office, Dr. Muskiday leans forward urgently, shouting, “You don’t understand! The micronanos are evolving into MACRONANOES!” The word “MACRONANOES!” appears in huge bold lettering dominating the panel. Cassie remains seated behind her desk, still not fully grasping the severity of the situation.

Panel 4: Dr. Muskiday runs frantically across the office floor with his arms spread wide. He warns, “They’ll take control of everybody in the office! We have to get everyone outta here before…” His lab coat and green tie trail behind him dramatically as he rushes toward the reader.

Panel 5: Dr. Muskiday stops in horror and quietly finishes, “…it’s too late.” Across the desk, Cassie’s entire head has been engulfed by a giant pink, fluffy-looking emoji cloud with angry eyes and a furious expression. The cloud hovers where her head should be, implying the evolving nanotech has already taken over her emotions.

“Will Reed change Emerald City?” More like the other way around

SEnycWhen Emerald City Comicon announced that it was merging with ReedPop, everyone who knows and loves the Seattle-based convention had the same question: “Will ReedPop change Emerald City Comicon?” I mean, after all, exhibitors and attendees alike have loved this show — run by Jim Demonakos and an amazing staff of dedicated comics-lovers — for years. Ask anyone who has ever exhibited there. and they’ll tell you that they’ve never been treated better. Ask the attendees. They’ll tell you the show is a highlight in their year. This show was special. And there’s more than a few people who felt a little worried that this Good Thing had come to an end earlier this year when the merger was announced. Scott, Cory and I wondered it on a recent episode of Surviving Creativity. We got both Jim and ReedPop VP Lance Festerman on the line to assuage our fears. They told us that Emerald City was going to continue unchanged. We crossed our fingers and hoped for the best. So imagine my surprise — my downright elation — when I walked into the ReedPop-run Special Edition; NYC convention this weekend. This was the first Reed show since incorporating the Emerald City staff, and it was — for all intents and purposes — Emerald City East. Better! It was like one of the old Emerald City shows. Remember being in the bottom of Mariner’s stadium? Remember those old comics-centric Seattle shows — those shows where the hardcore love of comics was as palpable as the smell of Silver Age quarter bins? That’s what happened at Pier 94 in Manhattan last weekend. Exhibitors got all the one-on-one attention, the shuttles to and from the show, the care, and the respect that they thought only happened once-a-year in Seattle. ReedPop may not change Emerald City, but from what I saw this weekend, Emerald City is changing ReedPop. And that’s good news for people like me who love those old-school comic-book comic conventions. I asked the former-ECCC staffers who stopped by my booth in their new roles with ReedPop the same question: “With this show proving such a success, what are the chances for Special Edition: Chicago… Special Edition: Oakland… Special Edition: Boston… and so on?” All I got were smiles. Wide smiles. There was a lot of that going around last weekend.