Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.
Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.
Transcript
Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…
Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)
Panel 2
Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}
Panel 3
Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.
Panel 4
Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.
Panel 5
Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod
After Dark
This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.
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Yes, he lives up to his name.
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Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.
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No, the North Pole will never be the same.
I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!
Lucy More Needs Less
With holiday gift-giving season upon us, I want to call your attention to one of the best children’s books I’ve ever read. It’s a fantasic book about rampant consumerism and the perils of trying to buy happiness.
It’s not carried by a major publisher because the author is not a celebrity. Thank goodness for Lulu.
Lucy More Needs Less examines the ethics of simplicity and moderation, but to a young reader, it is also a lively tale of a preposterously overindulgent family. Seven-year-old Lucy More wants to play with her best friend, Mimi, but is stymied by her inability to find what she needs in the great towers of playthings in and around her house. Her loving parents “cure� her frustration by buying her new toys every day, which makes the towers — and her frustration— grow. Lucy’s wealth of toys eventually proves disastrous, and it is Mimi who shows the More family that the solution to every problem is not found in the marketplace.
It’s written and illustrated by a co-worker of mine, a talented, award-winning graphic artist. You’re gonna fall in love with the illustrations. You’re gonna appreciate the moral of the story as you read it to your kids. You’re gonna feel like you did the first time you read a Dr. Seuss book.
If you’re in the market for a children’s book — and if you care about the message as well as the story — you’ve got to give this book a try. Do I even need to mention it’s available through Lulu, the font of all good things published? It’s called
Lucy More Needs Less. Here’s a preview.
