Chapter 17 | Page 3b: Hot Stuff

Posted on December 19, 2025 by Brad Guigar

Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.

Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.

Transcript

Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…

Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)

Panel 2

Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}

Panel 3

Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.

Panel 4

Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.

Panel 5

Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod

After Dark

This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.

  • Yes, he lives up to his name.

  • Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.

  • No, the North Pole will never be the same.

I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!

Mad Monster Party — LIVE!

Posted on September 27, 2006 by Brad Guigar

Mad Monster Party — LIVE!

According to Animation Magazine, Warner Brothers has optioned the rights to one of my favorite Rankin-Bass animated features, Mad Monster Party. Mad Monster Party was a Halloween-themed stop-motion animation from the masters who brought you all of those great Christmas specials like Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and Santa Claus is Coming to Town. With a heavy influency from MAD magazine — it was co-written by Harvey Kurtzman and the characters were designed by Jack Davis — it’s a real treat. And with voices by Boris Karloff and Phyllis Diller, it’s absolutely irresistible. In a notable change from the Victorian-era women in the Christmas specials, the female lead, Francesca, is a curvy, buxom, husky-voiced sexy red-head with a mind just as sinister as the ghastliest of the monsters. I am officially champing at the bit.