Well, after my sophomore attempt at stand-up comedy (you can hear it detailed on this episode of Plus-Two Comedy), I finally steeled myself for another trip to the microphone. And since I didn’t stink too badly, I’m happy to share it with you.
This was a nice event — put on by a couple of really excellent comedians. It was a comedy showcase stage in the back of a gaming room at Jester’s Playhouse, an awesome comic shop in Northfield, N.J. Unfortunately, due to a scheduling mix-up, there was a gaming event taking place in the same room that caused a constant background murmur throughout the show. That wasn’t optimal. And the audience was… intimate. But the comedians were top-notch, and the experience was one that I’d gladly do all over again.
So here it is, an expanded 10-minute monologue from Your Favorite Cartoonist. If you’re a longtime reader of Courting Disaster and/or Tales from the Con, you just might hear some familiar phrases.
Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.
Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.
Transcript
Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…
Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)
Panel 2
Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}
Panel 3
Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.
Panel 4
Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.
Panel 5
Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod
After Dark
This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.
-
Yes, he lives up to his name.
-
Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.
-
No, the North Pole will never be the same.
I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!
