Chapter 17 | Page 13b: Hard bargaining

Posted on April 2, 2026 by Brad Guigar

At Evil Inc, even labor negotiations can spiral out of control — especially when “hard bargaining” takes on a whole new meaning. Cassie Cruz just realized that the conference room she prepped for Dr. Muskiday’s… unconventional solution… is already booked for a high-stakes union negotiation. Unfortunately, it looks like Doctor Threat and the henchpersons may have already reached an agreement.

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Transcript

Panel 1
Cassie Cruz (angry):
“We are NOT having an orgy at our desks!”

Dr. Muskiday (calmly defensive):
“Of course not! I stocked the conference room with mattresses and lube.”

Panel 2
Cassie Cruz (panicking):
“The conference room?! Doctor Threat is scheduled to negotiate a new contract with the henchpersons’ union in there!”

Panel 3
Cassie Cruz (looking toward a slightly open door):
“Where’s Doctor Threat?”

Dr. Muskiday (matter-of-fact):
“I believe that’s him in the middle of — erm — ‘collective bargaining.’”

(Sound effects from behind the closed conference room door:)
“Hhh hhh”
“Plap Ngh Plap Plap”
“Hngh hhh”
“mmf mmf mmf”

Detailed Alt Text

A three-panel comic set inside an office at Evil Inc.

Panel 1: Cassie Cruz, a professional woman with short brown hair, red glasses, a white blazer, and a low-cut yellow top, stands beside her desk looking furious. A small pink “emotion cloud” with a skull icon floats near her head, indicating anger. She shouts that they are not having an orgy at their desks. Standing nearby is Dr. Muskiday, a short humanoid with a fly’s head—large red compound eyes, small body, and lab coat—who calmly explains that he already prepared the conference room with mattresses and lube.

Panel 2: Close-up on Cassie clutching her head in alarm. Her expression is wide-eyed and panicked. She exclaims that the conference room is supposed to be used for an important union negotiation between Doctor Threat and the henchpersons’ union.

Panel 3: Cassie and Dr. Muskiday stand in a hallway facing a slightly open conference room door. Cassie asks where Doctor Threat is. Muskiday gestures toward the door and awkwardly suggests that Doctor Threat is inside, in the middle of “collective bargaining,” implying something sexual. From inside the room comes exaggerated, comic-style sound effects indicating vigorous activity: heavy breathing (“hhh hhh,” “hngh”), rhythmic “plap” noises, and muffled sounds (“mmf mmf”). The implication is that the union negotiation has devolved into an orgy inside the conference room.

Top Ten Halloween Songs for Kids

Posted on October 21, 2013 by Brad Guigar
As usual, the Guigar family is hosting its annual Halloween bash for the boys and their/our friends.  I’ve been working on priming a Pandora channel but thumbs-upping and thumbs-downing a bunch of spooky hits. Here is my Top-13 list of the best.

10. “Dinner With Drac,” John “The Cool Ghoul” Zacherle

Philly-born John Zacherle was a TV horror-show host, and if you remember from my Greystone Inn days, I have a soft spot in my heart for those guys. This rock novelty ditty was recorded near the height of his popularity.

9. “Purple People Eater,” Sheb Wooley

Few people know of the great Sheb Wooley. He was the “Weird” Al Yankovich for classic Country music back in the 70s. And, like most of the breakout Country stars of that era, he had a crossover hit — “Purple People Eater.” I first got this song as part of an album called “Dumb Ditties” that our family got on (get this) 8-track tape! I never did quite figure out whether this was a People-Eater that was purple or if this was a creature that sustained itself on devouring purple people.

8. “Witch Doctor,” Dave Seville and the Chipmunks

Ooo Eee, Ooo Ah-Ah

Ting tang

Walla walla bing bang.

Ooo Eee, Ooo Ah-Ah

Ting tang

Walla walla bing bang.

The finest free verse of Ross Bagdasarian, the Fresno-born genius behind Alvin and the Chipmunks. This hit was Bagdasarian’s first experiment with altering the speed of the recording to achieve the trademark voices of his alter egos.

7. Theme from “The Munsters” and theme from “The Addams Family” (tie)

Both iconic musical intros to two fantastic, iconic TV sitcoms, I have to include these on my playlist even if most of the kids are familiar with the shows behind the tunes. Musically, the “Munsters” theme has serious earworm appeal, and I’ve yet to find a kind who didn’t want to snap along with the “Addams Family” tune.

6. “The Blob” by … Burt Bacharach?

Did you know Burt Bacharach wrote the theme song to the Steve McQueen sci-fi horror classic “The Blob”? Me neither. recording as “The Five Blobs,” the Bacharach-led group of studio musicians performed this swanky cha-cha.

5. “Grim Grinning Ghosts”

Composed by Buddy Baker, with lyrics written by X Atencio, this is the song that ushers you through Disney’s Haunted Mansion ride. During our trip to Disneyworld last December, my seven-year-old and I rode that ride about a dozen times. I know the words by heart.

4. “Ghostbusters”, Ray Parker Jr.

Who ya gonna call? Well, if your name is Huey Lewis, the answer is “my lawyer.” According to this law suit, Huey felt that the spooky smash hit stole from his own “I Want a New Drug.” They settled out of court. And amicably so. Lewis has stated that working through the process with “Ghostbusters” producers laid the groundwork to his working on “Back To The Future” — another 80s movie hit.

3. “Thriller” Michael Jackson

The Gloved One’s “Thriller” album made music history. The video for the song was the first music video to be selected by the Library of Congress for the National film Registry. Danceable (if not singable), this is the perfect song to crank up to drown out the din of sugared-up goblins.

2. “This is Halloween,” Danny Elfman

Let’s face it, any of the music from The Nightmare Before Christmas is going to be the perfect compliment to your Halloween party. But this one is the most upbeat and Halloween-y. And if you thumbs-up this one on your own Pandora channel, you’ll get the rest offered in your mix as well.

1. The Monster Mash, Bobby “Boris” Picket

Was there ever any question? There’s no doubt in my mind that this is the all-time best Halloween hit. Everybody knows the words and most of us can do a decent Boris Karloff impersonation to sing along. It’s a graveyard smash.