Chapter 17, Page 26b: Massive Power Surge

Dr. Muskiday was this close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos.

Then came a massive power surge.

Now the macronanos are suddenly swimming in raw emotional energy, Muskiday has to redouble his efforts, and nobody at Evil Inc can figure out where all that extra power came from.

Meanwhile, somewhere nearby, Countess Influencia has a very simple request for Captain Heroic:

“Kiss me.”

Mystery solved.


Evil Inc After Dark: Full Stream Ahead collects three complete Evil Inc storylines — along with their adults-only “after dark” counterparts. These spicy chapters peel back the curtain on what happens when superhero satire and workplace comedy take a decidedly NSFW turn.

• Heroic Revenge — Captain Heroic and Miss Match try to build trust while Commander Heroic continues to loom over their relationship. Meanwhile, Lightning Lady falls for a mysterious new face at Evil Inc whose past may prove explosive.

• Homeward Bound — Desi’s time on Earth is almost up unless she can pull off one major act of mischief. Her solution looks suspiciously like an OnlyFans account. Meanwhile, Cap and Miss Match discover that Commander Heroic still has opinions about their love life.

• Long-Lost Fiends — Cassie Cruz’s superhero temp agency is booming, but Thea Rhutman has villainous plans of her own. And Lightning Lady finds herself tempted by an old flame — a cheerful, musclebound minotaur.

And that’s not all. Full Stream Ahead includes the brand-new bonus story “Loads of Love,” an unrated adventure never before collected in print. When Dynasty and Battalion discover their superpowers can be passed along genetically, they decide it may be time to start a new kind of super team — with a little hands-on assistance from their friends.

Packed with superhero satire, workplace comedy, romantic complications, and plenty of adults-only bonus material, Full Stream Ahead is the next oversized installment of Evil Inc After Dark.


Transcript

Panel 1:
Countess: You heard me, Cap… I said ‘kiss me!”

Panel 2
Captain Heroic leans forward to kiss

Panel 3:
Countess’ phone releases confetti, breaking up the kiss: Congratulations! 500.1k followers!

Panel 4:
Countess: That’s… that’s half-a-million!
Captain Heroic: How many followers would make you truly happy?

Panel 5:
Countess: …more.

Panel 6:
Narration box: Back at Evil Inc
Sound effect: Arrrrrggghhhh!

Panel 7:
Holo-Clone Miss Match: What’s the matter, snookums?
Dr. Muskiday: I was so close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos!

Panel 8:
What happened?

Panel 9:
Dr. Muskiday: They’ve had a massive power surge. I’ll need to re-double my efforts!

Panel 10:
HoloClone Miss Match: Where did they get so much raw emotional power?!

Panel 11:
Miss Match (controlled by a macronano) is watching the Countess’ livestream as Hailey asks Cap to kiss her.


Alt text

Five-panel Evil Inc comic. Back at Evil Inc, HoloClone Miss Match asks Dr. Muskiday what is wrong. Muskiday says he was close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos, but they have experienced a massive power surge. He says he will need to redouble his efforts and wonders where they got so much raw emotional power. In the final panel, a macronano reacts violently to Countess Influencia’s offscreen command, “Kiss me,” while HoloClone Miss Match asks whether this means she can use her Mentos bikini.

A Case of Libel?

Recently, a Web site saw fit to run a piece that incorrectly alleged that my site had lost over 50% of its visitors in the last two years.

Since part of my income comes from advertisers who base their buying decisions on my Web traffic, it is incumbent upon me to address this defamation.

I won’t link to the site for obvious reasons — the poster makes similar allegations against other webcartoonists that I can only assume are as inaccurate as the statement made about Evil Inc, and I would hate for their reputations to be besmirched any further on account of my giving this blogger the notoriety he seems to so badly desire.

So, as much as I find it unseemly to trot out my Web traffic statistics to a readership that would probably prefer I spend time with other subjects, here are two graphs that represent my unique visitors and my pageviews over a 24-month period.

I have stripped the numbers off the chart because that’s proprietary information that I don’t share publicly. However, it is plain to see that I have been steadily gaining visitors and pageviews over the past 24 months. As a matter of fact, my unique-visitors statistic is up over 50% from September 2007 — and pageviews are up close to 60%.

Obviously, that’s going to be an important metric for any advertiser, and I need to clarify this untruth immediately. But beyond that, this blogger’s post is an insult to you. He wants the world to think that you guys are supporting this site less.

If anything, you guys have been more active and supportive than ever before! You’ve been telling your friends, you’ve been participating in the forum, you’ve been reading the archives… you’ve been the best readership in webcomics, in my opinion. Not the worst.

So, where’s the misinformation coming from?

The blogger makes use of statistics from “Google Trends” — which uses an unknown algorithmic formula to arrive at its metric. A note at the bottom of the Google Trends site clearly states that the numbers are estimates.

Using these numbers to make assumptions about a Web site’s “health” is nothing short of malicious.

My statistics — the ones used to build the charts above — are gathered both from analytic code embedded in each page on my site and from the host of this site itself, which gathers traffic statistics on all of the files served through this domain.

In other words, it isn’t an estimate. It’s fact.

But that didn’t stop the blogger from using these estimates to make what a lawyer might call a “statement of fact” that my site had lost more than fifty percent of its readers!

To say that I am appalled by this defamation is putting it lightly.