Chapter 17 | Page 3b: Hot Stuff

Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.

Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.

Transcript

Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…

Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)

Panel 2

Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}

Panel 3

Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.

Panel 4

Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.

Panel 5

Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod

After Dark

This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.

  • Yes, he lives up to his name.

  • Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.

  • No, the North Pole will never be the same.

I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!

Review: Final Crisis Aftermath: Escape #2


Final Crisis Aftermath: Escape #2
Creative team: Story by Ivan Brandon; art by Marco Rudi

When I attended Alma College, we had kind of a Saturday-night ritual. After coming home from the parties and the non-stop bacchanalia that was my social life, my friends and I would retire to my dorm room and flip on my small, black-and-white TV set. After adjusting the antenna, one of the three stations I’d be able to pick up came fuzzily into view.

By the way. I’m not that old. I graduated in 1991.

One of the TV shows that we’d keep running into was The Prisoner.

Now, in case you’re not familiar, The Prisoner was a surreal series about a former secret agent who is held prisoner in a mysterious seaside village where his captors try to find out why he abruptly resigned from his job. It wasn’t until the end of the series that anyone was able to make heads or tails out of anything.

My friends and I were seeing re-runs. Skipping episodes. Drunk.

Think of watching Lost out-of-order. Through a fish tank.

We hated that show with a white-hot passion.

Reading Final Crisis Aftermath: Escape has brought back that same feeling to me of being in my dorm room, watching The Prisoner, trying to figure out WTF is going on.

And now I know what people mean when they say that there’s a fine line between love and hate.

There’s no doubt that writer Ivan Brandon is conjuring a Prisoner vibe with this title. But I’m not drunk reading this comic. And I’m a little more mature. And maybe a bit smarter.

And I like it.

Almost makes me yearn for that old black-and-white TV set.