Dr. Muskiday was this close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos.
Then came a massive power surge.
Now the macronanos are suddenly swimming in raw emotional energy, Muskiday has to redouble his efforts, and nobody at Evil Inc can figure out where all that extra power came from.
Meanwhile, somewhere nearby, Countess Influencia has a very simple request for Captain Heroic:
“Kiss me.”
Mystery solved.
Evil Inc After Dark: Full Stream Ahead collects three complete Evil Inc storylines — along with their adults-only “after dark” counterparts. These spicy chapters peel back the curtain on what happens when superhero satire and workplace comedy take a decidedly NSFW turn.
• Heroic Revenge — Captain Heroic and Miss Match try to build trust while Commander Heroic continues to loom over their relationship. Meanwhile, Lightning Lady falls for a mysterious new face at Evil Inc whose past may prove explosive.
• Homeward Bound — Desi’s time on Earth is almost up unless she can pull off one major act of mischief. Her solution looks suspiciously like an OnlyFans account. Meanwhile, Cap and Miss Match discover that Commander Heroic still has opinions about their love life.
• Long-Lost Fiends — Cassie Cruz’s superhero temp agency is booming, but Thea Rhutman has villainous plans of her own. And Lightning Lady finds herself tempted by an old flame — a cheerful, musclebound minotaur.
And that’s not all. Full Stream Ahead includes the brand-new bonus story “Loads of Love,” an unrated adventure never before collected in print. When Dynasty and Battalion discover their superpowers can be passed along genetically, they decide it may be time to start a new kind of super team — with a little hands-on assistance from their friends.
Packed with superhero satire, workplace comedy, romantic complications, and plenty of adults-only bonus material, Full Stream Ahead is the next oversized installment of Evil Inc After Dark.
Transcript
Panel 1:
Countess: You heard me, Cap… I said ‘kiss me!”
Panel 2
Captain Heroic leans forward to kiss
Panel 3:
Countess’ phone releases confetti, breaking up the kiss: Congratulations! 500.1k followers!
Panel 4:
Countess: That’s… that’s half-a-million!
Captain Heroic: How many followers would make you truly happy?
Panel 5:
Countess: …more.
Panel 6:
Narration box: Back at Evil Inc
Sound effect: Arrrrrggghhhh!
Panel 7:
Holo-Clone Miss Match: What’s the matter, snookums?
Dr. Muskiday: I was so close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos!
Panel 8:
What happened?
Panel 9:
Dr. Muskiday: They’ve had a massive power surge. I’ll need to re-double my efforts!
Panel 10:
HoloClone Miss Match: Where did they get so much raw emotional power?!
Panel 11:
Miss Match (controlled by a macronano) is watching the Countess’ livestream as Hailey asks Cap to kiss her.
Alt text
Five-panel Evil Inc comic. Back at Evil Inc, HoloClone Miss Match asks Dr. Muskiday what is wrong. Muskiday says he was close to finding a way to defeat the macronanos, but they have experienced a massive power surge. He says he will need to redouble his efforts and wonders where they got so much raw emotional power. In the final panel, a macronano reacts violently to Countess Influencia’s offscreen command, “Kiss me,” while HoloClone Miss Match asks whether this means she can use her Mentos bikini.
Writer: Gail Simone
Pencils: Nicola Scott
Inks: Doug Hazlewood
Colors: Jason Wright
Letters: Travis Lanham
Between the two major villain-centric titles being offered by Marvel and DC, it’s impossible to pick the better series. Thunderbolts consistently delivers a stunningly realistic look at a band of covert operatives under the leadership of Marvel’s top bad guy, Norman Osborn. And Gail Simone’s Secret Six brings the deft characterization and philosophical discussions of villainy that a guy like me really grooves on.
This week, it’s character over story as Secret Six bests the T’bolts with a delightful story of Catman, Bane and Ragdoll thwarting a planned series of kidnappings in Gotham city out of respect for the fallen Batman.
All the while, they have a thinly veiled discussion about the possibility of either Catman or Bane replacing the Dark Knight in Gotham.
As Ragdoll, dressed as Robin, interjects hilarious asides.
This is a beautiful issue. Scott and Hazlewood even work in nod to the 60s TV series with a “sideways-rapelling-down-a-building-on-a-batrope” scene.
As they thwart kidnapping after kidnapping, Bane and Catman discuss the very meaning of villainy in a comic-book world — and how closely these two villains are to ascend the role of the Bat. But appropriately enough, their actual words as in opposition to their thoughts, as they discuss how much they don’t want that to happen.
Their vicious treatment is expertly played against a backdrop of saving children, which Simone expertly plays to its full heart-string-tugging potential.
In the end, their final thwart is intruded upon my Nightwing, who reads them the riot act and tosses them out.
Catman: “What we did was right. You can’t tell me otherwise. But I hear that sneer. And I hear that contempt. And I remember why I hate those little dictators.”
Bane: “They define us because we have always allowed them to do so. They are both our motivation and the architects of our descent.”
I respectfully submit that you’ll get no better in-story discussion of comic-book villainy anywhere in print.
In print.
Get Secret Six #9 at mycomicshop.com
