Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.
Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.
Transcript
Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…
Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)
Panel 2
Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}
Panel 3
Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.
Panel 4
Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.
Panel 5
Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod
After Dark
This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.
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Yes, he lives up to his name.
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Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.
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No, the North Pole will never be the same.
I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!
I know… I know…. I’ve already waxed hysterical over the
new, evil Mary Marvel In
Final Crisis #3 written by Grant Morrison. I’ve already made it clear that I thought that a characterization such as that had so many possibilities and was being undervalued in its current incarnation.
I mean… a truly evil Mary Marvel would be thrilling to draw and to write, right? I was certain of it — as if I had already seen it.
So, I’m doing this
charity appearance in Moorestown, NJ, this Saturday. part of the gig is that my friend Michael is gathering comics and graphic novels to ship overseas to military men and women. I’m clearing out my comics stash, selecting issues that I know I’m never going to want to either re-read or save for what ever little increase in value they may be fated for. And I come across the reason that I was so convinced that they’re doing Mary wrong.
Because I’ve already seen it done right in
JLA Classified #8!
Remember? The “
I Can’t Believe It’s Not The Justice League” run by Giffen, DeMatteis, Macguire and Rubinstein?! August of 2005?!?
They travel to a ubiquitous parallel Earth only to be greeted by an evil Mary Marvel. I had completely forgotten all about it until I was doing the little trip-down-memory-lane in my comics closet.
Now
this is how evil Mary should be done. It’s obvious the evil Mary in
Countdown to Infinite Crisis #47 was based on the Giffens/DeMatteis version.
The costume is spot-on and the attitude is pitch-perfect. Throw in a little inner turmoil and set for a slow boil.
Let’s hope Morrison cleans out his back issues, too, real soon.
