Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.
Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.
Transcript
Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…
Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)
Panel 2
Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}
Panel 3
Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.
Panel 4
Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.
Panel 5
Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod
After Dark
This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.
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Yes, he lives up to his name.
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Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.
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No, the North Pole will never be the same.
I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!
TWiV: Taking stock of super-villains
Junior: Besides teeing up a tasty plot about springing Tarantula from a maximum-security prison for supers (all at the behest of the Penguin),
Secret Six introduces a new super villian that has more creep-out value than any new character introduced by either Marvel or DC in recent memory.
Leave it to a brilliant mind like Gail Simone’s to bring us a “terror is in what you
don’t see” kind of Hitchcockian baddie like Junior.
Here’s what we know about Junior. No one ever sees him and lives to tell about it (even his two plaid-clad henches wear blindfolds). He’s in control of every mob operation west of the Mississippi. Intergang and the 100 pay him tribute. He’s blodthirsty, wicked, and sadistic.
And he does it all from inside a small crate next to a rotary telephone and a notepad.
I
dare you to fall asleep with that image in your head tonight.
Junior starts at a solid 6 on the VQ scale. Five for an excellent introduction of a compelling character. Plus one for the way he handles an underling who crosses him.
Secret Six is off to a full gallop. This is going to be an awesome run. The chemistry between Catman and Deadshot is tremendous. Ragdoll is handled cleverly and with an almost joyful sense of the macabre. Throw in the hint of an affair between Catman and Huntress, and we’ve got a party. The jury is still out on what Bane brings to the table, but his sparse dialogue is quickly turning me into a believer.
