At Evil Inc, even labor negotiations can spiral out of control — especially when “hard bargaining” takes on a whole new meaning. Cassie Cruz just realized that the conference room she prepped for Dr. Muskiday’s… unconventional solution… is already booked for a high-stakes union negotiation. Unfortunately, it looks like Doctor Threat and the henchpersons may have already reached an agreement.
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Transcript
Panel 1
Cassie Cruz (angry):
“We are NOT having an orgy at our desks!”
Dr. Muskiday (calmly defensive):
“Of course not! I stocked the conference room with mattresses and lube.”
Panel 2
Cassie Cruz (panicking):
“The conference room?! Doctor Threat is scheduled to negotiate a new contract with the henchpersons’ union in there!”
Panel 3
Cassie Cruz (looking toward a slightly open door):
“Where’s Doctor Threat?”
Dr. Muskiday (matter-of-fact):
“I believe that’s him in the middle of — erm — ‘collective bargaining.’”
(Sound effects from behind the closed conference room door:)
“Hhh hhh”
“Plap Ngh Plap Plap”
“Hngh hhh”
“mmf mmf mmf”
Detailed Alt Text
A three-panel comic set inside an office at Evil Inc.
Panel 1: Cassie Cruz, a professional woman with short brown hair, red glasses, a white blazer, and a low-cut yellow top, stands beside her desk looking furious. A small pink “emotion cloud” with a skull icon floats near her head, indicating anger. She shouts that they are not having an orgy at their desks. Standing nearby is Dr. Muskiday, a short humanoid with a fly’s head—large red compound eyes, small body, and lab coat—who calmly explains that he already prepared the conference room with mattresses and lube.
Panel 2: Close-up on Cassie clutching her head in alarm. Her expression is wide-eyed and panicked. She exclaims that the conference room is supposed to be used for an important union negotiation between Doctor Threat and the henchpersons’ union.
Panel 3: Cassie and Dr. Muskiday stand in a hallway facing a slightly open conference room door. Cassie asks where Doctor Threat is. Muskiday gestures toward the door and awkwardly suggests that Doctor Threat is inside, in the middle of “collective bargaining,” implying something sexual. From inside the room comes exaggerated, comic-style sound effects indicating vigorous activity: heavy breathing (“hhh hhh,” “hngh”), rhythmic “plap” noises, and muffled sounds (“mmf mmf”). The implication is that the union negotiation has devolved into an orgy inside the conference room.
Courting Disaster, my weekly comic about sex, love, and relationships updates every Friday.
You’ll laugh your pants off. This week’s question…
A reader writes… Q: I have been with this lovely girl for over two years. We have often talked about our hopes and dreams and everything seemed in alignment until a few days ago. She confessed that the dreams I thought we shared were not what she really wanted. I had hoped we would get married and have kids some day. It turns out she doesn’t ever want kids and was only going along with it so I would stay with her. She doesn’t think it would be fair to keep me from my dreams by stringing me along nor does she think it is fair of me to ask her to have kids. We love a lot of the same things and I imagined things going smoothly for a long time to come. I’ve tried talking to her and trying to compromise but there doesn’t seem to be a way to make both of us happy. Beyond this one important issue there isn’t anything else wrong with us and I love her dearly. We are both graduating college soon and we could head in different directions but realistically neither of us have a plan and I am not ready to say goodbye and I don’t think she is either. So my question is now what?
Don’t answer here… go on over to the CD site and
offer some advice.