Chapter 17 | Page 3b: Hot Stuff

Today’s page takes us back to Ralph’s Diner, where Captain Heroic proves—once again—that nothing rattles him… not even a surprise soup bath.

Hailey is mortified, Captain Heroic is dripping, and somewhere across the diner, Yazmine Velour is livestreaming the whole thing as heart emojis rain from the internet. It’s a small moment, but one that says a lot about who Cap really is—and why people can’t help falling for him.

Transcript

Panel 1
Hailey (distraught that she has dumped hot soup on Captain Heroic): Omigod Omigod Omigod…

Captain Heroic (turning to another person eating at the diner): Excuse me. Would you hand me a napkin, please? (The person hands him a napkin)

Panel 2

Hailey: I’m so sorry Captain Heroic, sir. I didn’t mean to — {sob}

Panel 3

Captain Heroic (handing her the napkin): Here. Please don’t cry.

Panel 4

Captain Heroic (continues): Most of my first impressions involve disintegration rays. And actual impressions. In concrete.

Panel 5

Captain Heroic: This was far more pleasant — not counting the bay leaf in my shirt.Yazmine Velour (as she livestreams the interaction from the other side of the diner, a torrent of heart emojis flow from her phone as the audience reacts): Omigod Omigod Omigod

After Dark

This week's commissioned MicroFic delivers exactly what you’d want from a pairing between Dynasty and Father Christmas.

  • Yes, he lives up to his name.

  • Yes, Dynasty knew exactly what she was doing.

  • No, the North Pole will never be the same.

I also posted the Goblin Girl MicroFic from the Monster Girl poll — and the response was so good, I might need to make these poll-powered MicroFics a recurring thing!

Courting Disaster: March 13, 2009


Courting Disaster, my weekly comic about sex, love, and relationships updates every Friday. You’ll laugh your pants off.

This week’s question…

Since the newspaper column that this comic accompanies is yet again stuck on the “tired wife / horny husband” theme, we’ll turn to another question e-mailed by a reader of this Web site…

A reader writes… Q: My parents have recently divorced, and my father has been dating a new woman. I am fine with this, however the woman has two children of her own. I like her, and the kids are fine as well.

The only thing is the older daughter has a huge crush on me. She is about three years younger than me, and finds almost any reason to spend time with me. It started when I was asked to watchdog for my dad over her at a school function, and now she asks for souvenirs from my work, invites me over for things, and finds ways to get me around. I have brought friends with me multiple times, and they all agree she is very into me.

She is very attractive, and under the circumstances, I might take her up on some of her hang out offers. I’ve asked all my friends, and the results are 50/50. Half think it is weird to even think about doing anything, and the others think there’s nothing wrong. We were not raised together, haven’t know each other long, and should any status change, I would not be living under the same roof.

As for other relevant info, our parents seem to be semi-serious. They have broken up a few times. Not really sure what to do. Not really looking for feedback regarding legality, more morality if anything.

Names and situations have been changes to protect the innocent.

Don’t answer here… go on over to the CD site and offer some advice.